FUCK ING PIECE OF SHIT!!!!

23 of FEB.

FUcking Noob day...

Why iszt it has to happen on me....

Why iszt i have to go thru shit all the time.


I never pray for anything extrodinary man....i juz wan to be able to breathe normally, be healthy, have a normal family, have sufficient income to live by.

Is that too much??


breaking = shit

relationship = shit

Health = shit

Everything = shit

Everything has been a down fall ever since she left me....

1. ARMY
Fucking army only know how to put pressure on men....ask them do this do that....when u achieve it.....they say oh good we should set higher standard....

I MAY BE THE BEST PHYSICAL TRAINEE AROUND BUT I STILL FUCKING HUMAN....
THE REASON I CAN'T BREATH NORMALLY IS BECUZ OF U FUCKING CUNT RETARDS MAKING ME RUN NON STOP.....CRAWL NON STOP.....USING THE PHRASE "BEST PT LEH" NON STOP.....FUCK ALL OF U GREEN MUNSO FUCKERS....HOPE U ALL ROT IN HELL.

2. Dad's Finiancial crisis. Credit card's bill.
if my dad is to use the credit card to buy expensive unreasonable stuff then he ought to deserve getting broke but no....it's to pay up for all the taxes and bills and monthly payment of the house....And SIA is too FUcked themselves too. they actually ask there people to take more no pay leave?? this is Fucking Bull!

3. Girlfriend who is sensitive??
I NEVER GOING TO SAY ANOTHER WORD.

4. MOM

The last thing i would wan to know is my drunk mom on the car driving around for 5 hours not knowing where is home...
hey mom i dun wan to say this but FUCK U MAN....WTF U THINKING!!!!
Gone are the days where my mom was the most sensible one in the family....
Gone are the days where my mom will still cook....
Now my mom only put her friends before the Family....hogging on the phone all the time....house phone handphone....
totally selfish....
dun give a shit that the family is in crisis now....
and that dad might be out of Job soon she still wan to play....have fun and merry.....
dun give a shit to house in need to save and still drive all her fucking dog friends all around....
dun give a shit whether the whole family is up waiting for her to be back knowing she might be in danger....
dun give a shit when asked where she was she still didn't say....
dun give a shit when my dad went out on his bike to find her....
wtf la u....really two ways man....
FUCKING DISAPPOINTED....
i dun tink i can bring myself to talk to u anymore man.....

5. Breaking
Health problem making me cannot give in my best in breaking...i mean I've been doing this for like 7 years? and if this is wat i do then how come i can't be good at it?? POwermoves suck.....footwork bullshit.....top rocks jiasai.....Yeah I really must agree i no longer have the same stamina as before already....no longer have the same drive.....no longer wan to be the best....




too much things happening in my life....suddenly all these only made me remember of one person....Tay Peishan....If i have
treat her properly....really really properly.....will today have happened??
was so down today....i dug out all my old stuffs and found all her letters and pictures.....couldn't help but teared....

i know this not relevent to wat's happening but i share it anway...
Here's a part of the letter she wrote:
(pei i hope u dun mind this)

"tossing and turning i juz can't get to sleep.....tis is by far the most personal letter you receive is wat i feel deep down you should know.....life would have been mundane if not for u...people always say if u love someone u should love the person fully flaws included....but i guess i'm selfish and spoilti refuse to love parts of u i can't accept...i hate it when you shout i hate it when u get angry at me and refuse to tell me why you're upset...i hate it when we are broke and have nothing to do....it makes me wonder if i have to have so much hate then how can i still love.....but i do...i love you Victor Soh JiA Qing.....wif all my heart......from when i do not know....but all i know is i still love you how as i write this.....everytime you get upset wif me or angry it hurts so bad it's like being stabbed a million times only i can't die i'm bleeding it hurts so bad it wun go away....no one will understand and no one can help me....no one but u....juz a touch from you juz a sign that u still want me and still care for me is all i need.....with juz that touch i suddenly feel like i'm on cloud 9...i cry even harder not from pain but from relief.....relieft that u are still mine...but this can only last about a week or so b4 the stabbing pain comes back.....sometimes i juz wan to let go of you juz a byebye and leave... sad to say i can't do it....
it's juz difficualt and scary.......i really dunno....we are still so young our relationship is still at its infantry....we both have such different goals and aspiration in life we are driven by very different things....the only thing we share is the love for each other....one thing i learnt about our relationship is nothing is perfect....i will have to take one step at a time....live life a day at a time.....but right now i still wan to hold on to that hand of urs....coz you are the most imp thing in my life....i can't live without you...i need you i wan you....and i wan you now...."

letter so sweet yet it did not serve as a reminder of how i should be treating her....
too bad everything is over.....

Pls Lord....Juz show me the restart button to life.....